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Aged Care: How to Bring Up the Idea With Your Parents

While it may be a difficult decision to make, sometimes Residential Aged Care is the best option we have for our parents. As such, it proves to be one of the most important yet difficult conversations we might ever have with our loved ones.

Sometimes, our siblings or other relatives may have strong feelings against Aged Care homes. Other times, our parents themselves are adamant about staying out of an Aged Care home.

Given these circumstances, it is easy to understand how this position can take up a lot of our time and patience. To help you out, we’ve come up with a few tips to assist you with dealing with the situation and initiate the conversation with as little stress as possible.


Don’t Wait Too Long For the Talk

 We understand that this situation may be difficult for all parties involved, but you’ll want to make sure you don’t wait too long before you actually bring up the idea. The thing is, waiting too long might put you in a spot where your parents are unable to fully participate in the dialogue, limiting their ability to share their wants and needs with you.


Have a Series of Conversations Rather Than One Big One

Some people approach the situation with “The Talk” in mind. By this, we mean that a lot of us rely on one big serious talk with our parents to settle the issue. The problem with that is that it can be a little overwhelming and may impede discussions. Take it slowly by covering the many aspects of the conversation over time, giving your elderly loved ones more time to mull over what you’ve talked about.


Time Your Approach

 You can’t just bring up Aged Care homes out of nowhere. Try to time the conversation in a way that you can choose the time and place for it, avoiding other important family events that may have an effect on their final decision.


Involve the Entire Family

These kinds of decisions are difficult to make and so should involve the family. After all, you wouldn’t want to suddenly have this brought up years and years after, with fingers pointed at you. You’ll want to make sure that all of you are agreed, to make sure that you all work as a team.


Ensure an Appropriate Environment

Similar to the point about timing, ensuring the right environment is set is another thing we have to consider. The setting of the conversations will be a big factor, as this can have an impact on how your elderly loved ones perceive the conversation. Plus, you want to be sure that you’re giving them the respect that they deserve by avoiding putting them on the spot in a public place given that things can get emotional.


Put Practicality First

It would be good to point out the practicality of your decision, pointing out the possible issues they may start facing as they continue to age. Things such as house maintenance, timely payment of bills, and the like are often what makes life difficult for seniors. As long as you prioritize their needs, framing it in the sense of practicality, you can at least show them that you’ve considered their wants and needs.



The bottom line is that our parents deserve a lot more than a rushed, stressful conversation. Given enough planning, we should be able to address the situation in a cool, calm, and coordinated manner. As long as you approach the situation strategically, this family conversation can be done with all parties satisfied with the outcome.

Homestyle Aged Care operates Aged Care residential homes in Melbourne and Geelong providing quality accommodation and services including permanent, respite and specialist dementia care. For more information on our services phone us on (03) 9559 0400 or contact us here.

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